doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize