we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Randomize
