i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
