It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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