I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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