We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
Randomize
