Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Randomize