So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
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