My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
