They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
