screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
Randomize
