dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Randomize
