Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Randomize
