How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
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