question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
