I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Randomize
