It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Shame is for Republicans.
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