I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Randomize
