So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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