I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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