About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize
