I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
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