Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
