And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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