hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize