whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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