Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
You made out with two different species that night
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
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