Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
