I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
