Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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