Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
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