sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
