I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Randomize
