It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
I need to align my fucking chakras
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Randomize