The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
