When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
I had to cum in my sink.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize
