she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
