mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
