i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
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