that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Send help, water and tortillas.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
