No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
