no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
third nipple confirmed
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize
