i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Randomize
