Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
