Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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