Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
