all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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