It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
