okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
i think we sleep fucked last night...
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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