So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Randomize
