Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize